Monday, August 10, 2009


A bonafide miracle happened today. You won't believe it even if I tell you but I'm going to tell you anyway.

Byrd went to the grocery store. By himself.

This is a man who, despite his intimidating stature, is borderline agoraphobic and has panic attacks at the grocery store, so the last time he went was... hmm... it's been about two years, I think. And I went with him that time. He hasn't been alone in a store in a decade.

He said he wanted to take care of me, seeing as how I'm into a bedridden fifth day of high fever and occasional delerium. Awww, isn't he just sho shweet!! (Actually, I know the real reason he wanted to go--he finished off the last pint of his favorite ice cream the other day.)

I helped him with the grocery list, knowing he wouldn't stick to it--he's a compulsive shopper and will buy pretty much anything that looks edible when there's no one (me) around to restrain him.

And off he went, forgetting the recycling (which is conveniently on the way to the store), forgetting the canvas bags, almost forgetting the list.

After an hour with no word, I got a little worried. Then he called. He couldn't find applesauce, or yogurt, and he had been overwhelmed by brands of bodywash (for him!), and what flavor of cough drops did I want?

He came home looking like the cat that swallowed the canary, evidently having whole new worlds opened up due to his expedition to Planet Grocery. I was then treated to a show-and-tell in the bedroom as he hauled in find after find: here were some instant noodles for me, and look at the TV dinners he'd found, and can you believe they have tiny bottles of Coke with resealable caps!?

I don't think I'm strong enough to go into the kitchen and see what insane things he pulled off the store shelves. At least he covered the list.

And I'm not one to complain about a miracle.


Susan said...

Ha ha the show and tell at the end!

Hope you are feeling better!

Raising Addie said...

LMAO!!! It is also a rare occasion when my husband ventures to the grocery store.

He is lucky enough to work from home so he hardly leaves the house. Me, I could not live like that going for weeks without venturing out. As least with his new car he now gets out more but since I have never driven in a standard before I have found that I get car sick. Now, he likes to drive this car fast and enjoys whipping it around bends and parking lots which doesn't help. And I have no one to blame but myself because I encouraged him to purchase it.

I am very sorry to hear that you are still sick. Doctors... I swear that they know just enough to get by sometimes and then leave us in the dark no better than we were before.

Please take care of yourself and let me know if there is anything that I can do to help. I know how hard it is to be sick and have big dogs with lots of energy to take care of.


happypitbull said...

@Staci: /evilgrin
Want to drive down here and walk my dogs? The day my husband does that, hell will freeze over... :D

I know what you mean about standards. Consider learning to drive it, though. They're fun, especially the sporty ones like you have!! Then you can terrify your hubby in return.

Dennis the Vizsla said...

Ha, too funny! I do most of the grocery shopping around here and am usually very good about sticking to the list (which I compile), but if I'm hungry and wander into frozen foods, there's a pretty good chance I'm going home with a stack of frozen pizzas and 20lbs of breaded chicken strips.

Woodrow, Sweetie, MJ Campanella said...

very cool

happy you didnt have to go and whatever he bought i am sure is fine

Woodrow - Sweetie & Sherman