Looks like I'm going back to school for yet another degree that hopefully won't be turned into yet another means to do more volunteer work whispers my husband. Aw, how did he guess my plan?!?
I mean, my Technical Communication degree got me a great freelance position as a copyeditor... and... helped me webmaster for a local animal shelter and create my own websites that I spend ungodly amounts of time working on...
I promise, sweetie, I'll get a job as a tax accountant and help corporations with their taxes and by corporations I mean nonprofits and by job I mean volunteer position.
I mean, we didn't really need that $30K tuition for anything else, right? :)
|Don't look at me, all I get are hand-me-down toys.|
At the time, I thought punching my husband in the buttocks was a very righteous thing to do, especially after he mocked me about something-or-other (my haircut? my ridiculously low Sleep Number? I can't recall anymore).
So I snuck up behind him while he was brushing his teeth, and gave him a solid whack in the behind.
Now, I'm not a total idiot. I knew, for example, that 300 lbs > 100 lbs. And also that I punch like a... girl who can't punch. That was why I fully intended to run for my life after committing the act.
My fist struck what felt like a slab of marble: solid, unyielding, unbreakable. Rather than flee, I doubled over clutching my sprained wrist.
Byrd looked up from the sink, toothbrush jutting from his lips, and appeared to notice me for the first time. "Hmm? Why are you crouched on the floor?"
Solid as a rock + feels nothing = ROBOT HUSBAND.
This happened over the Christmas break:
|Buns-of-Steel Man putting up new siding|
Here is what the house looked like pre-holidays, from the back yard.
We have been re-siding the house in phases. The first phase was around 2004 ("lower" house, left side in the photo), and the second phase was in 2007 (two-story section, center). But the back addition (right side) was still undone.
The siding on the back addition was barely hanging in there. This was the original wood siding from, I dunno, 1970. A good portion of the siding had fallen off, or was hanging by a nail. And then there were the ancient single-pane windows with black trim. For years, the addition has looked like a trashy little shack, a nagging reminder of what the whole house used to look like.