Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Forgiveness

Because I'm small and rather wimpy and I have no sense of space or rhythm, I'm also a klutz. My appendages surrender right-of-way to larger, heavier objects, usually netting me a bruise in the process. My husband bought me a baby-sized hammer and screwdrivers so I could help him remodel; the regular-sized tools are just too hard for me to handle. And I am a walking disaster when holding a leaf rake.

Speaking of leaf rakes, one time I smashed one into Star's face by accident. How was I supposed to know she was going to investigate what I was doing in the shed (trying to extricate the rake from a pile of tools)? The rake popped out suddenly and I was unable to direct its momentum.

But Star took the blow without complaint. No yelp, no bark--she just skipped aside, head tilted as if apologizing for being in the way.

One time I hit Dozer in the nose with a shovel. Again, an accident caused by his ball and my hole being in the same place at the same time.

Dozer took two steps back, shook his head, licked his nose. Then he picked up the ball and dropped it in my hole again, his eyes wide and expectant. Ah ha! You hit me; now you owe me a toss.

I jabbed Star in the eye with my finger.
I tripped over Dozer in the black of the night, waking him from a dead sleep and crushing him.
I rolled my desk chair over Star's ears.
I swatted Dozer on the butt while trying to kill a fly.
I trod over Star's dainty paws as she napped.
I dropped a rake on Dozer's shoulders.
I dropped a huge tree branch on Star's head.

Not to mention the countless nail trimmings that ended badly (hand-eye coordination? not me), the miserable baths, the annoying ear cleanings, the embarrassing vet visits...

I would imagine the dogs to be terrified of my every move by now. I think I would be.

Yet even now Dozer sleeps two inches behind my desk chair. A careless roll backwards--say, if I stood up without looking--would get his tail and possibly a good part of his foot caught up in the wheels. History repeats itself; does he remember the past? Does he care?

Star still runs up to investigate when I'm digging around in the shed. She's never gotten anything good (treats, toys, a new friend) from that shed--only rakes in the face and shovels falling chaotically on top of her. This doesn't seem to deter her in the least. There's eternal, innocent hope in her face as she dashes over to me.

The wild, uncontrollable lashing of the unwinding garden hose sends her into paroxysms of joyous zoomies.

No matter what awful things I do, the dogs never reject me.

Behold the power of forgiveness.

9 comments:

daisydog said...

And love!

forsythia said...

One time we went away on a sunny afternoon and left our dogs--our beagle and our joint-custody pitbull--in our fenced backyard. While we were away, a sudden rainstorm came up. When we got home, we found two soaked doggies by the patio door. Now, if they had been human beings, we would have heard about it. "How COULD you go away and just leave us like outdoors like that? Did you even bother to read the weather forecast? All you think about is yourself." etc etc blah blah blah. The dogs just wiggled and wagged and were glad to see us and happy to come in out of the rain.

GiGwriter said...

Yes, these brutal dogs-killing machines, aren't they.

A 165-lb autistic boy stepped full force on my pit bull's front paw once. He cried. Loudly. And looked at the boy as if to ask why he did that.

He was also bitten 2 separate times, by an Akita (sp?); and a shepherd-mix. He cried. He never fought back.

So much for my vicious dog.

YOU, little writer lady, on the other hand ... I will avoid. :P

Leila said...

The best part of doggy love is the pure unconditional part.

Allison (Dog Mom) said...

Isn't it awesome how dogs have very specific memory loss? They don't remember when you forget about them, or when you injure them, but they remember very specifically the rustle of the treat jar. :)

Burning Moon said...

I've definitely done some damage to my pets as well. Once I even lost my temper at Fiona, screamed at her and smacked her on the head.
I IMMEDIATELY started crying...could not believe I had let myself get so angry. She was a little bit nervous but when I started crying she came up to me slowly and just laid her head in my lap. Of course, this just made me cry harder but it showed me that even the worse things can be forgiven when there is love.
I've never been afraid of any of my dogs, but for that one moment she was afraid of me. That won't ever happen again!
Now, the accidental injuries like you are talking about, of course they'd forgive you. Just like you forgive them for all their accidents and oopsies.

Dennis the Vizsla said...

hello happypitbull its dennis the vizsla dog hay ummmmm hmmm note to self ware body armer wen arownd dozer and stars mama ok bye

PoochesForPeace said...

I gave your blog an award today- it's posted on my blog if you want to see it!

Luda's Mummy said...

I have been accused to attempting to amputate my dogs' toes with the nail clippers. That problem has been solved by my husband's Dremel. I was afraid to use it at first, but now I'm a pro. You can take off as little or as much nail as you want, and so far, no injuries - just some tickly paws.